Sunday, January 17, 2010

Changes

I like sleeping on his side of the bed. It's closer to the bathroom and farther from the door...

But I miss having him to cuddle with at night.

I like sitting on his side of the couch. It's a better view of the t.v...

But I miss not having him next to me to watch the tv and laugh with.

I like being able to eat whatever I want to...

But I miss cooking for him and i hate all the weight I've gained.

I like getting my coffee every morning, whenever I want... I hate that I have to have a coffee every morning because I don't sleep well without him.

I love having my dogs now...I hate that he never met them.


I love meeting with friends whenever I want.i love the profoundly deep friendships with kind, loving and FUN people I have gained through this. I love that I am closer to my sister now... I miss him having to share that with.

I love my pink, short hair... He would have hated it. I miss his face when he didn't like something.

I like driving his Moreno...I miss riding shotgun while he drove it.

i like taking the dogs for walks at night... I miss walking with him.

i like being able to buy things whenever i want...i hate having to manage the bills. (and i hate not having a second income. worrying about money sucks.)

i love the church that i'm going to...I miss having him there to lead me.
I love the deeper relationship with Christ I have gained through this.... I miss having him with me.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have done the same things (well, some of them) and had the exact same thoughts!!! I love so much about what I now have in life and am so grateful for it.... BUT, I miss so much too. And I'd rather have my husband than all these new things/changes that I've made. Sucks. But your entry made me feel less crazy because I'm doing the same! :-)

daniela said...

Erica,
I feel the same....it hurts bad sometimes!!!
Today I went for the Citizenship interview(the 1st one)and I was wondering what on earth I was doing there without him being with me. The whole thing was just strange.
Thinking of you much!