Sunday, March 28, 2010

I still miss you.

I still miss him.

Found this song through another blog. I dare you not to cry...

Sunday, March 21, 2010

My Montage 3/20/10 at

'Cause I have friends here that love me!

Thursday, March 18, 2010

How did I get here?

Have you arrived somewhere and thought, "how did I get here?" Have you ever blanked out while driving? Zoned out?
That's where I am now.

Someone gave me a letter I wrote a couple months back. I don't remember writing it. I looked at some assessments I wrote at work. Don't recall putting my name on those. I looked at blogs I posted. Don't know who that girl was writing that.

Uh oh. what if I don't remember this? How long will this zoned out thing last?

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

If We Ever Meet Again

I added a new song to my playlist. If We Ever Meet Again by Timbaland. I know, I'm so gangsta.

Isn't it interesting that even the coolest songs about hooking up at a club, can remind me of grief?

Monday, March 8, 2010

Colorado Visit

Gorgeous Colorado-ness.

No, I'm not pregnant. Just carrying alot in my pockets.
My dear friend Sarah. Our families have lived next door to each other since I was 5 years old. She taught me how to walk to school in kindergarten. Our kindergarten teacher told all the other teachers to keep us and our friends separated the rest of elementary school because we were a "social class". We got in trouble in 6th grade for passing notes. I can't read lips so she had to pretend to have to throw something away and pass me a note while walking to the trash can. She went to a dance freshman year with HeeJun. She was a bridesmaid in my wedding.
She and her awesome hubby live in Colorado now with a precious new miracle. I got to go visit her this weekend and cuddle her little baby!

I also had the incredible chance to visit two friends from my mission trip days. We all went on a summer mission trip to Saratov, Russia years ago. It was so heartwarming and comforting to sit with them; laughter and tears!
I have amazing friends. there is not "elephant in the room" when they are around. They let me talk about HeeJun all I want. They understand my inappropriate responses or my tears at weird times. they allow me the chance to laugh and to be joyful. The blanket of grief was still there on the trip. However, it was a cool sheet there to bring me comfort, rather than a heavy blanket weighing me down.