Awkward Turkey

I went yesterday and indulged in a massage. My back has been aching and for some strange reason, I'm a bit stressed so I decided it was about time. Crazy awkward and I think I might have scarred the masseuse for life. It was a man (insert southern Delta Burke accent here)! I haven't been touched like that by a man in 8 months. Awkward. Once I took some deep healing meditative breaths, I started to relax a bit. He kept asking me if I was holding my breath and telling me to "relax". huh??, i thought i was. He said I was too tense and could definitely tell something was messed up with my back.

Then he got to my neck and I panicked. I had no idea I would have such a strong reaction to someone touching my neck. All i could think about was HeeJun's neck. He kept telling me to relax and even asked me if I had a rod in my neck. I just kept tensing up while telling myself, "come on girl relax". He said I was scaring him. Then i told him...well, my husband died by blunt force trauma to the neck. And boom, he backed off. Of course, he tried to get me to sign up for more massages, and obviously i need them...but maybe not near my neck, please.