Sunday, July 12, 2009

Engaging therapy

I engaged in life this weekend and it was so therapeutic.

My Amy brought her baby and hubby to visit me this weekend. I can not describe how amazingly healing it is to hold her beautiful daughter and to see my dear friend. I remember hearing about Amy's pregnancy and having so many strong emotions. Now holding sweet Cora only brings peace and sweet joy.

I also was spoiled tremendously by dear Liz and her adorable baby girl . This quote reminds me of Liz. "We find that our circles of friends shift...We are surprised and disappointed that people we thought were good friends became distant, uneasy, and unable to help us. Others who were casual acquaintances become suddenly close, sustainers of life for us..."_ Martha Whitmore Hickman. I find that i can breathe around these sustainers of life, even if it is only for a little while.
I worked on HeeJun's scrapbook. Should I call it a life book? Or a love book? I was actually excited about putting those pictures together and finding just the right arrangement for the pictures. At times it felt like HeeJun was right there in the pictures, so real. I could feel his smile, his touch, his presence. I almost turned around a couple of times or shouted out, "Hey HeeJ, remember when we went ski-ing with Sarah and Richard? Remember Great Gatsby day? Look at how silly I look in that homecoming dress! Look at how young we look?"

I finally got the energy, the oofph, to buy the paint to re-paint our kitchen. I hate the flaming yellow we painted it. Big Bird yellow as Matt called it. But HeeJun painted it, so it was harder than I thought to buy the paint. one small step.

I found this blog site with these hilarious "widow cards". I laugh every time I look at them. I printed out the "You'll have to excuse my lateness. I'm a widow" , "You'll have to excuse the mess. I'm a widow" and the "You'll have to excuse me for forgetting your name, again" cards.

I danced tonight like Cameron Diaz dances in the Holiday. Except I danced to Playing for Change. Hands in the air. dancing and imagining my HeeJun dancing with me.


Anonymous said...

What color are you going to paint?! Glad you had fun with the Bells and just in general this weekend.

Julie and Jim Acuna said...

Did you paint yet??? I can help :) Painting is very theraputic, by the way.

amy eudy said...

i'm so thankful you got some time to be blessed and distracted by awesome friends and kiddies. i love your scrapbook. i've been searching all over for pictures of the scrapbook that was shown in the movie My Sister's Keeper... it might have been the most amazing piece of art i've ever seen. i thought it might inspire you but google does not want me to find it. that movie is excellent but i would not recommend it unless you feel like crying a river. if i come across pictures though, i will send them your way.